Let’s get one thing straight: control is a fairytale for grown-ups.
The billionaires?
They’re just well-dressed gamblers placing big bets with other people’s money.
The politicians? Overpaid crisis managers pretending they know what’s going on.
The tech giants? They built the algorithms, but they have no clue where they’re taking us.
Even the smartest minds—the philosophers, the strategists, the so-called “great men of history”—they’ve spent lifetimes trying to figure out the rules of the game.
Some came close. Others just screamed into the void.
Nietzsche, though? He saw it clearly. “There are no facts, only interpretations.”
You think you’re driving the car, but really, you’re just reacting to the road as it swerves in front of you.
And that’s the joke. No one’s steering. Not even the ones who built the road.
Let’s break it down—ten reasons why control is a myth, and why the best you can do is learn to dance with the chaos.
1. The Game Is Too Big for the Players (Heraclitus)
Heraclitus said, “No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man.”
Think about that. You try to control something, but by the time you’ve grasped it, it’s already changed.
Governments write laws, but the people they govern shift before the ink dries.
Tech companies design social media, but users mutate it into something they never predicted.
Everyone’s trying to dam the river. No one realizes it’s already flowing somewhere else.
2. Ideas Are Wildfires, Not Chess Moves (Plato)
Plato believed in the power of ideas. The trouble is, once an idea gets out, it doesn’t belong to anyone.
Philosophers, politicians, marketing executives—they all think they can shape how people think. But ideas, like fire, don’t obey their creators.
Marx had ideas about economics; those ideas ended up fueling revolutions he never saw coming. Freud had ideas about the unconscious; now they’re pop psychology in BuzzFeed articles.
Plato thought the world needed Philosopher Kings to guide the masses. The problem is, the masses don’t wait for a king. They just run with whatever idea burns the brightest.
3. Algorithms Are Flying Blind (Descartes)
Descartes thought, “I think, therefore I am.” Today’s AI thinks, but does it exist?
Google, Facebook, TikTok—their algorithms shape what we see, what we think about, what we care about. You’d think that would mean they’re in control. But the truth? They’re as lost as we are.
Facebook optimized for engagement, and suddenly fake news was outperforming real news. Twitter pushed trending topics, and suddenly world leaders were shaping policy through memes.
Even the smartest minds in tech don’t know where this is all headed. They built the machine, but the machine has a mind of its own.
4. Memes Outrun Governments (Machiavelli)
Machiavelli wrote The Prince as a guide to power. He thought control was about strategy, about knowing how to manipulate perception.
But even he would’ve been baffled by today’s reality. Because in the age of the internet, perception isn’t controlled—it’s hijacked.
One viral joke can undo years of careful political maneuvering.
One meme can define a public figure forever. No king, no president, no CEO has the power to stop it.
Machiavelli might’ve understood power. But even he didn’t predict the power of a teenager with a smartphone and a sharp sense of humor.
5. Your Brain Is a Hackable Mess (Sartre)
Sartre said, “Man is condemned to be free.” Sounds poetic. But what if we’re not as free as we think?
Most of your thoughts aren’t even yours. They’re echoes of things you’ve read, seen, absorbed without realizing. Your political beliefs?
Probably shaped by the media you consume. Your taste in music? A product of what you were exposed to as a kid. Your deepest values? Chances are, they were handed to you before you even knew what choice was.
Sartre believed in radical freedom. But the hard truth is, most of us aren’t even aware of the invisible forces shaping us.
6. History Is Just One Long Series of Accidents (Hegel)
Hegel had this grand idea that history moves in a dialectical process—thesis, antithesis, synthesis. Sounds logical, right?
Except when you actually look at history, it’s a mess.
Empires fall because of plagues. Movements rise because of flukes.
The Titanic didn’t sink because of fate—it hit an iceberg at just the right angle to break apart.
Control? There is no master plan. Just a long string of unpredictable collisions.
7. Revolutions Never Go as Planned (Marx)
Marx had a vision: the workers of the world would unite, overthrow the ruling class, and create a just society.
Then came the 20th century. Communism spread, but instead of utopias, we got authoritarian regimes, show trials, and secret police. The revolution didn’t go as planned. It never does.
People think they can control change. But change has its own ideas.
8. The Stock Market Is a Casino (Adam Smith)
Adam Smith, the father of capitalism, believed in the invisible hand—the idea that free markets naturally regulate themselves.
Tell that to the 2008 financial crash. Or the dot-com bubble. Or every recession, ever.
Economists make predictions. Traders make bets. But at the end of the day, the stock market runs on emotion—fear, greed, panic. If it were rational, bubbles wouldn’t exist.
9. Nature Doesn’t Care About Your Plans (Spinoza)
Spinoza believed everything in the universe followed natural laws.
Humans like to think we’re special. But the truth is, we’re just another part of the system.
You can build a city, but one earthquake, one flood, one pandemic, and nature reminds you who’s in charge.
You can negotiate with politicians. You can bribe officials. But you can’t argue with a hurricane.
10. The Only Way to Win Is to Stop Trying to Control Everything (Lao Tzu)
Lao Tzu, the old Taoist sage, had the right idea: stop fighting the current. Flow with it.
The most powerful people in the world? They’re not the ones trying to bend reality to their will. They’re the ones who move with the chaos. They don’t resist the storm—they ride it.
You can spend your life gripping the illusion of control with white-knuckled intensity. Or you can learn to move with the madness.
The Cosmic SLAP
Here’s the kicker: The ones who think they’re in control are usually the ones most controlled—by their fears, their ambitions, their desperate need to impose order on the wild, thrashing mess of reality.
The real winners? They’re not the ones in charge. They’re the ones who know control is a joke—and decide to play along anyway.
So what’s it going to be?
You drowning?
Or are you learning how to surf?
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